My Entry in the Susanna Leonard Hill Holiday Writing Contest!

12 Dec

This was supposed to be my Friday post, but our internet keeps going out (we have a  lot of ice here) so I am going to post it now just in case our internet goes out for a while. I don’t want to miss tomorrow’s deadline for posting my entry (plus tomorrow is Friday the 13th and you never know…).

YAY! It’s

The 3rd Annual Holiday Contest!!!

crashing sleigh

The contest is hosted by Susanna Leonard Hill! Check out all of the totally awesome entries by clicking HERE!

Now for the rules (taken from Ms. Hill’s blog) – 

“Write a children’s story about a Holiday Mishap, mix-up, miscommunication, mistake, or potential disaster (a la Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer :)).  Your story may be poetry or prose, silly or serious or sweet, religious or not, based on Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or whatever you celebrate, but is not to exceed 350 words not counting the title”

I liked the idea of writing about a holiday mishap and really racked my brain on what to write because I wanted it to be different. Here is what I came up with (I am at 350 words!). I hope you like it! 😀

CODE NAME: KRINGLE

Although the Christmas Eve air was frozen, a bead of sweat ran down the side of the pilot’s face. He delivered the package and slipped away, or so he thought.

“I’m getting too old for this,” he muttered. The pilot glanced behind him. He could see the outline of the jet formation closing in on his craft. “They keep trying to catch me in the act. They’ll have to try harder than that!”

“Sir, the aircraft have a lock on our position. You can’t make the next drop,” said the officer in front of the computer.

“Unacceptable!” boomed the pilot. “We’ll make every scheduled drop. We lost the Shenyang J-11s over China and we’ll out-run these jets too.”

 The craft’s controls felt heavy in the pilot’s hands. Every year their tracking technology advanced greatly, but he had a dedicated team working day and night to make sure he stayed ahead. His missions depend on secrecy.

“Dash, tell Rudy to break formation. He can use his infrared beacon to distract those F-16s!”

“Roger that!” Dash barked.

“Sir, NORAD confirmed they are tracking us. We’re no longer a covert operation,” the officer worried.

“Contact our mole,” the pilot ordered. “She’ll feed NORAD false information. They’ll be chasing a flock of geese soon.”

The officer stuttered, “B-But, didn’t she –“

“Get run over by a reindeer?” The pilot interrupted. “Ha! That was just a cover. She faked her death to become our NORAD inside-agent.”

“I’m on it Sir,” said the officer as he typed an encrypted message.

The pilot watched a red light fly off to the South-West of his position. He smiled to himself when the F-16s followed. “Way to go Rudy! We’re going for our next drop. Get ready boys!”

“Sir, we just received a communication from Agent Grandma. She was successful. NORAD now has our current position somewhere over Indonesia,” the officer said with a grin that ran from pointy ear to pointy ear.

“Try to track me, will ya?!” Santa’s belly shook with laughter as he hollered with a twinkle in his eye. “HO HO HO! Maybe next year!”

English: Canada NORAD Jet Fighter Santa Escort

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

English: NORAD Santa Claus Fighter Escort

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

111 Responses to “My Entry in the Susanna Leonard Hill Holiday Writing Contest!”

  1. cherylsec December 12, 2013 at 7:08 pm #

    Erik, this is terrific! It’s so clever and funny. I love it! Great job!

    Like

  2. elainekielykearns December 12, 2013 at 7:38 pm #

    Erik, I love it! Very clever and original! Fantastic job! 🙂

    Like

  3. Pat Brisson December 12, 2013 at 7:50 pm #

    An original take on an old tale, Erik! Nicely done.

    Like

  4. Genevieve Petrillo December 12, 2013 at 8:22 pm #

    I love this story! Santa is a smart pilot!

    Love and licks,
    Cupcake

    Like

  5. Michelle Isenhoff December 12, 2013 at 8:31 pm #

    Lol! Love it!

    Like

  6. stanleyandkatrina December 12, 2013 at 8:37 pm #

    🙂 This is so much fun! Great job – the cover story is great.
    Best of luck with your entry, Erik.
    ~CM & the Gang

    Like

  7. Stephanie@Fairday's Blog December 12, 2013 at 8:43 pm #

    Love this! You are so creative! This story made me chuckle and I loved your description. Well done!

    Like

  8. viviankirkfield December 12, 2013 at 8:59 pm #

    Originality – check! Great writing – check! Totally funny – check!
    This is a winner, Erik! GREAT JOB!

    Like

  9. Carrie Finison December 12, 2013 at 9:20 pm #

    Erik, this story is EXCELLENT. I loved it. LOL at the part about agent Grandma faking her own death. Very clever and well done. Great job!

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 13, 2013 at 7:27 am #

      ‘Grandma didn’t get hit by a reindeer!’ 😉 I’m glad you like my entry, Ms. Finison! 😀

      Like

  10. Patricia Tilton December 12, 2013 at 10:45 pm #

    Yay — I’ve been waiting what for your Christmas story. This is outstanding!. It is funny, paced and well written. So clever to include “Granda” as a secret agent. You have a future as an author — even if it is on the side!

    Like

  11. teresarobeson December 12, 2013 at 10:48 pm #

    Love your unique and very hilarious story, Erik! That reference to Grandma being run over by reindeer was the best!! 😀

    Like

  12. Stacy S. Jensen December 12, 2013 at 10:50 pm #

    Wonderful. Love Love the secret agent part!

    Like

  13. Beth Stilborn December 12, 2013 at 11:06 pm #

    This is absolutely brilliant! Oh my, I enjoyed this story! Yay, Erik!

    Like

  14. Yvonne Mes December 12, 2013 at 11:28 pm #

    That is one awesome story and a unique take on how Santa delivers those toys! Loved the whole ‘ops’ speak.

    Like

  15. julie rowan zoch December 12, 2013 at 11:52 pm #

    SUPERB!

    Like

  16. ontheplumtree December 13, 2013 at 4:40 am #

    Ha! Prfect Erik!!!

    Like

  17. jama December 13, 2013 at 7:34 am #

    Fabuloso!

    Like

  18. Kirsten W. Larson December 13, 2013 at 8:30 am #

    Hands-down THE winner. Jet planes? NORAD? Erik, you are amazing. Have a wonderful holiday season.

    Like

  19. jan December 13, 2013 at 9:43 am #

    brilliant, erik! i want this pilot flying my next delta trip.

    Like

  20. Donna L. Sadd December 13, 2013 at 9:57 am #

    FUN-TASTIC! Great job, Eric! Happy Holidays! :0)

    Like

  21. Tracy Campbell December 13, 2013 at 11:42 am #

    Your imagination is so cool, Erik. Way too go! 🙂

    Like

  22. Meg Miller December 13, 2013 at 11:58 am #

    Wow Erik! What a fantastic story. I LOVE this line, ““Dash, tell Rudy to break formation. He can use his infrared beacon to distract those F-16s!”” and your opening line is great, really conveys the tension. I see great things in your future!!! 😀 Wow.

    Like

  23. Robyn Campbell December 13, 2013 at 1:03 pm #

    Erik, this is total GENIUS! So funny and gave me a warm deep down feeling when I read it. Love that ending. PERFECTO! Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 14, 2013 at 8:53 am #

      Thank you Ms. Campbell! I’m glad you like the ending. 🙂 Merry Christmas! 😀

      Like

  24. Stacy Couch December 13, 2013 at 3:10 pm #

    Love the Secret Agent Santa, Erik! Clever and super fun!

    Like

  25. Penny Parker Klostermann December 13, 2013 at 4:53 pm #

    My belly’s shaking with laughter, too! Grandma Agent has to be the best character EVER!!!!
    I love this, Erik! It just plain ol’ awesome!

    Like

  26. rnewman504 December 13, 2013 at 7:25 pm #

    Erik, I second what Penny just said. The story is awesome! Good luck with the competition. Happy, happy holidays!

    Like

  27. Susanna Leonard Hill December 13, 2013 at 10:25 pm #

    Oh my goodness! Fantastic, Erik! So clever and original! I love the idea of Santa being a secret agent and trying to outwit NORAD and all the other busybodies trying to track him! And Grandma faking her own death to become his mole? Inspired!!! And the glee he gets in gaining the upper hand once again? Delightful! 🙂 Thanks so much for a superb entry and for joining in the holiday contest fun!

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 14, 2013 at 8:59 am #

      Thank you Ms. Hill! I am glad I got such an awesome comment from the awesome ground-hog lady herself! BAA-HA-HA-HA! 😉

      Like

  28. KidLitReviews December 13, 2013 at 11:58 pm #

    Erik, has anyone ever told you your writing is improving? This story hit the “Brilliant” bell on my writing scale. Publishers are going to be fighting over you! Wonderful story with lots of clever twists. If Susanna does not choose this story as the winner, well, there’is a ringer. I’ll call foul. 😀

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 14, 2013 at 9:06 am #

      I don’t like fighting. But I like action. 😉 I’m glad you love it! 🙂

      Like

  29. lionelsnod December 14, 2013 at 7:43 am #

    Great post Erik! What a darling, amusing story. I love the line about the “mole” getting run over by a reindeer. I also love the fact that you used F-16’s (and I love the photos). I worked around F-15’s when I was in the Air Force, but saw plenty of F-16’s too. I have no doubt if anyone could avoid these awesome aircrafts it is Mr. Kringle himself. Thanks for putting a smile on my face before Christmas cookie day!

    Paul R. Hewlett

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 14, 2013 at 9:09 am #

      Thank you Mr. Hewlett! It’s great that you were in the Air Force! My math teacher is in the Air Force Reserves. 🙂

      Like

  30. laura516 December 14, 2013 at 7:50 am #

    I always look forward to your tremendously creative entries. This is another winner! Loved it!

    Like

  31. Martha Hubbard December 14, 2013 at 8:15 am #

    I love this, Erik! “Agent Grandma”…LOL!!! This one’s a winner – great job! 🙂

    Like

  32. lindaboyden December 14, 2013 at 9:36 am #

    That was brilliant, and very original, Erik.

    Like

  33. Pamela Courtney December 14, 2013 at 10:30 am #

    What an amazing artist you are! This story is just amazing, Erik! This is such an original story and so well written. Oh and I love the graphics. Totally Major! You’re giving everyone a run for their money. Can’t wait to see the outcome of this contest. Again, well done.

    Like

  34. Michelle Heidenrich Barnes December 14, 2013 at 12:24 pm #

    Wow! Great job! You’ve got quite a future ahead of you… Santa’s not the only one ahead of the curve. 😉

    Like

  35. solvangsherrie December 14, 2013 at 1:32 pm #

    Very original! I like it!

    Like

  36. nrhatch December 14, 2013 at 1:37 pm #

    Glad Santa was able to “fly under the radar.” 😉

    Like

  37. Catherine Johnson December 14, 2013 at 3:27 pm #

    Oh my goodness that is hilarious! Awesome job Erik!

    Like

  38. Lauri Meyers December 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm #

    What a great idea! I love all the connections you wove in and the excellent sprinkling of humor!

    Like

  39. deborahholtwilliams December 14, 2013 at 8:58 pm #

    So well-written, Erik! Just excellent!

    Like

  40. Tina Cho December 15, 2013 at 1:20 am #

    Great tension! So creative, Erik! Merry Christmas!

    Like

  41. writersideup December 15, 2013 at 1:21 am #

    I REALLY love this story! I’m SO impressed a St. Bernard wrote this! I mean, getting past having to type with giant paws is enough of a feat, but THIS! Wow! 😉

    Like

    • thiskidreviewsbooks December 16, 2013 at 4:47 pm #

      Ahem. You know I have the right to delete comments, right? 😡

      Like

      • writersideup December 16, 2013 at 5:24 pm #

        (Pssst…hey, Erik—you DID see my comment on Sue’s blog, right? The “drooling” blog? 😉 )

        Like

      • thiskidreviewsbooks December 16, 2013 at 5:24 pm #

        YES. 👿

        Like

  42. cecilia clark December 15, 2013 at 8:55 am #

    brilliant! good covert ops there. well done and well written.

    Like

  43. Sue Heavenrich December 15, 2013 at 3:38 pm #

    what fun to read. I love Santa doing covert ops…. and the whole reference to NORAD (who started “tracking Santa” years ago).

    Like

  44. Maxine December 15, 2013 at 4:42 pm #

    Great story Erik, it kept me laughing and reading right to the end. Your Christmas references were so cleverly woven into the story too. Happy Holidays to you and your family 🙂

    Like

  45. thislittlebirdie December 15, 2013 at 9:06 pm #

    Great job Erik!

    Like

  46. Jennifer Kaap December 15, 2013 at 10:24 pm #

    Awesome! Count me in as a fan of your reference to “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” reference 😉

    Like

  47. Darlene December 16, 2013 at 11:59 pm #

    I love this one. You should make it into a picture book one day!

    Like

  48. Jarm Del Boccio December 17, 2013 at 1:25 pm #

    What a fun and clever twist, Erik. I smiled the whole way through. Well done!

    Like

  49. Cat Michaels December 19, 2013 at 10:57 am #

    Joyful tale and fine example of creative writing! I credited and re-posted on my blog.

    Like

  50. clarbojahn December 19, 2013 at 12:41 pm #

    Yes, this is most original entry and deserves an honorable mention. Great going, Erik. Congrats!. 🙂

    Merry Christmas!

    Like

  51. slpstanley December 22, 2013 at 5:05 pm #

    I meant to leave a comment earlier and say I loved your entry! You are super talented and have a great career ahead of you! Well done you.

    Like

  52. Myra GB January 9, 2014 at 7:41 pm #

    This is perfect, Erik! I love it! I can see it being turned into a fabulous picture book! Also reminded me a little bit of Hoodwinked with the reference to Agent Grandma. Have you watched that film yet? One of our absolute favourites.

    Like

  53. Lynn March 20, 2015 at 9:02 pm #

    This was well done, Erik. You have such a wonderful imagination. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. VIP Post: Code Name: Kringle by Erik, kid reivewer at ThisKidReviewsBooks.com | Kid Lit Reviews - December 14, 2013

    […] here.  Instead of my usual drool, I would like you to read a young boy’s drool. Erik, from ThisKidReviewsBooks, wrote an entry for Susanna Leonard Hill’s Third Annual Holiday Writing Contest. His story is […]

    Like

  2. Holiday Writing Contest Results | Rocking Horse Writing - December 23, 2013

    […] My Entry in the Susanna Leonard Hill Holiday Writing Contest! (thiskidreviewsbooks.com) […]

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