Tag Archives: humor

Review! Children and the Tundra by Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey

27 Nov

tundraChildren and the Tundra
Series: The Haggis-On-Whey World of Unbelievable Brilliance #5
Written by Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey
Designed by Lauren LoPrete
64 pages – ages 13+
Published by McSweeney’s on April 12, 2016

Synopsis- Have you ever wanted to know about the coldest regions on Earth – the hearts of children? Have you ever wanted to get up close and personal with all of the cute and cuddly animals – who want out of the tundra life? Then, unfortunately, this is the book for you. It would have been really nice if it were two books. You see, due to horribly-prioritized budget cuts in the publishing house, these two very different topics-children and the tundra-are placed within the same covers. Even worse, people don’t treat it like the science book it is *cough cough*most definitely not*cough cough*.

What I Thought- This book is my kind of book! It is a satirical view on science books meant for children. The humor is VERY dry and you have to like that kind to really appreciate this book. I did show it to some friends and they didn’t get it/find it that funny, so I guess it depends on how you find your funny bone.  The book is completely factually inaccurate, all while saying anyone who says different is making things up. It includes a list of the main kinds of tundra, which include the same picture of a tundra with different picture styles and captions. It includes the history of the early sightings of children and how they were discovered by a French monk who liked writing in English. Then there is the girl who was too boring to write about…

boring

This is only the beginning folks, so hold onto your hats and dive into the Haggis-On-Whey World of Unbelievable Brilliance!

Dr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey has 31 degrees from 32 institutions of higher learning – “most of them in countries better than yours.”. She an expert on everything and really distrusts the children species. Her husband Benny Haggis-On-Whey is basically completely useless and only adds to the humor with his incompetence.

benny

Authors Benny and Doris

The  book is a clean read for all ages, but really young kids won’t “get” it. I would say it is a great read for 13+ who has a broader sense of humor.

I give this book five out of five bookworms with a caution that not everyone will appreciate the humor.fivebooks

Rather Unpleasant Cautionary Tales For Ill-Mannered And Immoderate Children by Ima Bratt

26 Jul

imabrattRather Unpleasant Cautionary Tales For Ill-Mannered And Immoderate Children
By Ima Bratt
60 pages – ages 8+
Published by Bratty Kid Books on April 14, 2013

This is a book full of short rhyming verse/stories about children and the end… of the children, that is. In this book, a girl explodes MID-TANTRUM! Isn’t THAT something? And a boy who does the opposite of what he’s told and gets eaten by bears at a zoo – Amazing right? And yet another boy gets eaten – by a giant fish who thought his tongue (which was always out) was a worm. I would hate to be him! Such ill-mannered children! 😉

This has a CLEAR message about being good and listening to what you are told. If you aren’t good, bad things will happen (okay maybe you won’t explode or get eaten by a giant fish, but you could get grounded…). I love that the book is all in rhyme verse, it really adds to the creepy feel of the book and it also is done well. I’m not a fan of horror stories at all and this book is not that. It’s kind of creepy but in a funny way. I think that maybe not all kids will get it, but I sure did and enjoyed it.  The humor in the book felt a lot like what happens to the kids in  Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (like when Augustus Gloop falls into the chocolate river because he wants to eat it and gets sucked up the big tube). Ms. Bratt really puts out some snarkiness, in a quirky-good way (Hey – wouldn’t Quirky and Snarky be great names for twins in a story?), At 60 pages it was a quick read for me and would have liked a couple more stories in it for my age and reading level. The book is a clean read and is appropriate for all ages as long as they like this type of humor. I will be looking for the next Bratt book to come out!

I give this book 4 out of 5 book worms!fourbooks

Follow Ms. Bratt on Facebook HERE.

Check out the official Bratt Stuff website HERE.

AND REMEMBER TO BE GOOD! Or rather unpleasant things will happen….

Sir Nathan and the Quest for Queen Gobbledeegook by Mark Simon Smith

21 May

Sir Nathan and the Quest for Queen Gobbledeegook (a Somewhat Silly Story Volume 1)

by Mark Simon Smith

240 pages – ages 7+

Published by CreateSpace on March 9, 2012

Queen Gobbledeegook is missing from the kingdom of Mariskatania! The hero of the land, Sir Nathan, and his trusty steed are sent to find her and bring her back. With the help of many strange and unique people (and things), our hero and his horse go through a long and difficult quest to find the queen. Will they succeed and not meet a horrible fate? Will they survive the giant-sized toddlers that want to eat them? Will our hero EVER get to finally smite someone (or thing)? Read the book to find out!!

This not somewhat silly, but VERY silly adventure has it all! I think the story is a great adventure story and there is so much silly humor in the book I was laughing out loud at a bunch of places! Sir Nathan is an AWESOME character and Tupolev, Sir Nathan’s talking horse, is another character I really liked. There are some simple illustrations throughout the book which were a nice addition. I really liked how each “evil” character Sir Nathan ran into actually turned out to be pretty nice! The book is completely clean of and bad language but packed full of silly humor! I recommend the book to advanced young readers and anyone who likes a good laugh!

Five out of five bookworms for Sir Nathan and the Quest for Queen Gobbledeegook!

To learn more about Mr. Smith and the Somewhat Silly Stories, please visit the Somewhat Silly Stories website HERE or visit Mr. Smith’s facebook page HERE.

You can get the book as an ebook or paperback. Click HERE for ordering information for the book!

Book 2 in the series, Sir Nathan and the Troublesome Task, is supposed to come out this month!

I get NERDy at the Harelysville Books Boy’s Book Club

19 Nov

***KSHHHHHH*** (Static)

“H.Q., Come in – do you read me?”

“Your transmission is coming through”

“This is Techno reporting. We had our N.E.R.D.S. (National Espionage Rescues and Defense Society) meeting Thursday night at Harleysville Books.  The customers in the store thought we were just talking about Michael Buckley’s book N.E.R.D.S. (Book 1, see my review HERE)! HA! Little did they know we were recruiting new members. Unit coordinator Pete, called our meeting to order and showed us a video from our Supreme Commander Michael Buckley, code name Beanpole. Mr. Buckley introduced our new recruits to the N.E.R.D.S. organization and its founding members – code names, Pufferfish, Gluestick, Flinch, Wheezer and Braceface. The recruits learned that being a “nerd” is the coolest thing ever because you can use your nerdy powers for good just like in our original training manual N.E.R.D.S. book 1.”

“Did the recruits have any special nerdy abilities?”

“Yes. Unit coordinator Pete had us all reveal something nerdy about ourselves. I, of course, said I had a great love of books and technology and that’s why my code name is Techno. The other recruits were Sensor (abilities of super hearing and super vision), Block (abilities to build ANYTHING out of LEGOs – AWESOME!) and another recruit that could grow to be taller than his opponent, has laser vision and a bazooka (very useful). There was also a new weapon designed at the meeting, a bazooka that can shoot bazookas. This was a failure because we realized the enemies we were shooting at now had bazookas.”

“Did you do any training?”

“We sharpened our skills, and our pencils, by fencing with our pencils, don’t worry none of the recruits got injured in the training. We then used our pencils to write things down about ourselves, things that people in the meeting didn’t know about us so we could learn what other nerdy abilities we may have. Unit Coordinator Pete said that he had 2 sisters.”

“Two sisters? WOW. No wonder Unit Coordinator Pete is so tough.”

“Unit Coordinator Pete then passed out illustrations from the training manual N.E.R.D.S. book 1 and had us write captions for the illustrations. Unit Coordinator Pete got the creative exercise from the N.E.R.D.S. training site www.teamnerds.com . The recruits started talking about the thumb scanner described in the training manual and the customers in Harleysville Books started to get suspicious so Unit Coordinator Pete called the meeting to an end.”

“That was very smart of Agent Pete. The recruits will be a great addition to our team.”

“Yes, I think we have a great nerdy team!”

***END TRANSMISSION***

For more information on Supreme Commander Buckley please visit his Facebook fan page HERE.  You can read my reviews of N.E.R.D.S. book 2 “M is for Mama’s Boy” HERE and N.E.R.D.S. book 3 “The Cheerleaders of DOOM” HERE.

I went to the Lititz Kid-Lit Festival and ran into Darth Vader

14 Nov

This past Saturday I went to the Lititz Kid-Lit Festival! Aaron’s Books in Lititz really put on a great event. Please visit their site by clicking HERE. When I walked in I saw… Skippyjon Jones!!! 😮 Grammy and Aaron from Aaron’s Books were just about to start to read “Skippyjon Jones: Up and Down” while Skippy acted it out. I REALLY liked when Grammy asked Skippy, “What kind of food do you eat, Skippyjon Jones? Cat food or Dog food?” I’m not sure Skippy knew what to make of that question! Then Grammy read “Skippyjon Jones” to all us kids (and adults, too), Aaron turned the pages of the book and Skippy acted that book out too! 🙂

Then out of the blue (actually it was ‘out of the hallway’), we heard… footsteps… and… breathing? I listened again “SHHHHHHUUHH” (inhale) “HHHHHHHUUUUUUHHHH” (exhale). NO!!! …Could it be?! Then out walked… DARTH VADER, A STORMTROOPER, TWO JAWAS, AND BOBA FETT!!!!!! Luckily I had my lightsaber! My sister and I got photos with the Star Wars characters from Garrison Carida of the 501st Legion (an all volunteer group of Star Wars fans that want to WOW kids and adults alike with their AWESOME costumes -go to their website HERE). I “high-fived” Lord Vader two (TWO!) times!! Boba Fett let me look like I was going to pierce him with my lightsaber while he jumped back with his hands in the air! HOW COOL! Boba Fett A.K.A. Michael Bryant even gave me his trading card. Thanks Mr. Bryant -you are an AWESOME Boba Fett!  The Star Wars characters were there to help promote Tom Angleberger’s newest Origami Yoda book, “Darth Paper Strikes Back” (see my review HERE). I got to see another stooky display of origami with Mr. Angleberger and I got to give him my origami Jedi Angleberger that I had been working on since I last saw him 😮 . Visit Mr. Angleberger’s site HERE.

The Kid-Lit festival had a bunch of workshops to go to. While me and my mom went to some workshops, my Dad and my little sister went to story time at Aaron’s Books (the actual event was held at the Linden Hall School for Girls). The stories were told by professional story tellers and my Dad and sister really enjoyed it.

I first went to a creative writing workshop with Courtney Sheinmel Author of several children’s books including “My So Called Family”, “Sincerely” and “All the Things You Are” (which I got a copy of to read and review -check back!). Ms. Sheinmel made the workshop a lot of fun. She had all of us kids come up with two characters, a setting and part of a plot and then had us all individually come up with the end of the story and asked us to put a “plot twist” in. It was great to hear all the different ideas that all us kids came up with. Ms. Sheinmel taught us that plot twists don’t always have to be a bad thing and that sometimes you need to write an outline of what your story is about but other times its OK to just write the story even if it’s bad at first, just write it and then go back and make it better. Visit Ms. Sheinmel’s website HERE.

I then went to a workshop by Sarah Darer Littman author of the young adult books and middle school Age books including “Life After” and her new book “Want to go Private” (a young adult book about internet safety for teens -not appropriate for my age but my mom picked up a copy). Ms. Littman talked about all the resources you can use when doing research for a book and how good research is necessary to make a book believable. For example in “Life After” she wrote about a girl who was from Argentina but Ms. Littman never went to Argentina and it was too expensive to go there. So she used google maps and images to see what Argentina really looks like and talked to people from there and she even did some Argentinian cooking to really get the idea of what being from Argentina was about. She told us that one of her friends, author Kate Messner, had to research how someone might steal the ORIGINAL Star Spangled Banner from the Smithsonian for her new book “Capture the Flag” (due out in 2012) and the curator of the Smithsonian actually let her (and her kids -lucky) into the Smithsonian for a behind the scenes tour and helped Ms. Messner figure out how her characters could pull the heist off! Ms. Littman said the coolest research she ever did was working with the FBI for her newest book “Want to go Private” (I think that would be cool too)! Visit Ms. Littman’s site HERE.

The last workshop I went to was “Pictures Telling Stories” with MATT PHELAN (author/illustrator of “Around the World” and “Storm in the Barn”) and ERIC WIGHT (author/illustrator of the FRANKIE PICKLE books)!! I couldn’t believe TWO awesome illustrators/authors teaching one class together 🙂 Mr. Wight started the class by drawing a circle ,a square, and a kind of an oval that gets skinny in the middle. He then told us that you can start drawing with really simple shapes like these and make the simple shapes into characters. He then made the circle into a Grand-Pa and he asked us what the other shapes should be. So we made the oval thingy into a giant fire-breathing peanut and the square into a tool-box robot. Then Mr. Phelan asked us to take these characters and make them into a story (seriously I wasn’t really concerned with the robot or giant fire-breathing peanut (let’s call him G.F.B.P.), but I didn’t know where Grand-Pa would fit into our story). So we came up with the G.F.B.P. attacking the city where Grand-Pa lives. Grand-Pa has a toolbox that turns into a robot that can fight the G.F.B.P. (pretty cool). Then Mr. Wight and Mr. Phelan talked about how you go from your idea to writing (or sketching) a rough draft of our comic. We learned about different speech bubbles, panel shapes and sizes and suprisicles. We also learned about how onomonopeia is important to telling about action and thoughts in comics (and I just like to write onomonopeia and my mom is amazed I can spell onomonopeia (hee hee)). We also got to try to make our own characters and comic strips. I think everyone there had a great time and learned a lot! Visit Mr. Phelan’s site by clicking HERE and Mr. Wight’s site by clicking HERE.

I also got to talk to A.S. King (author of the YA novels “Everybody Sees the Ants” and “Please Ignore Vera Deitz”). Ms. King swore to me she was a vulcan that only turns into a human on November 7th every year and she clipped her ears so she can fit in with the rest of us humans (hee hee). Needless to say, she was SUPER nice. Visit A.S. King’s site HERE.

There were other workshops that were at the same time as the ones I went to. I wish I could have gone to them all. I didn’t get a chance to meet or talk to all the authors I would have liked to, but it was getting late and we had to go 😦

Before I left I caught up with one of the owners of Aaron’s Books (Sam). Sam told me that this is the third year for the festival. The first year twenty people came and this year between 150-200 people attended (and HEY DARTH VADER WAS HERE TOO! He must count for like another 50 or so). Sam hopes to do it again next year.

I really hope they do 🙂

IT WAS AWESOME!!!

Vordak The Incomprehensible: Rule the School

12 Sep

Vordak The Incomprehensible: Rule the School
By Vordak T. Incomprehensible (A.K.A. Scott Seegert)
Illustrated by  John Martin
Published in 2011 by Egmont USA
192 pages -ages 9+

Vordak the Incomprehensible, the World’s most super super-villan, is back once again to give us the gift of his stupendous brilliance! As the book starts out, Vordak retired and a little out of shape, decides to invent the “Abominable Age-Reduction Ray” to zap himself back to his former superbly fit self. After a series of unfortunate events, like overshooting the age he was trying to reduce himself to and a nosy neighbor reporting the new 12 year-old to a truant officer, Vordak finds himself enrolled as a student in Farding Junior High School. What does the world’s most awesome villan do? TAKE OVER THE SCHOOL (of course) MWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA! Can Vordak deal with the blah blah blah of the teachers, going to school with Commander Virtue’s (his arch-enemy’s) SON, running for class president, and UGH – HOMEWORK?!? Will he find the part he needs to fix the age ray and return to his former glorious self? I’m not gonna tell you. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I didn’t think Mr. Incomprehensible could top his greatness from the first book, but he did! For those of you who haven’t read Vordak’s first book, How To Grow Up and Rule The World (Shame On You) click HERE to read my review of that book. The author (Vordak) is actually Scott Seegert who writes the book as if super-villan Vordak was writing it. Like the 1st Vordak book, this book was hysterical! It was a great follow up to the first book. I like the illustrations a lot. The book has very creative characters like Little Vince Sminion (my favorite). I like how it is narrated by Vordak T. Incomprehensible and it seems like he’s talking to the reader. I think this book would be good for kid’s who don’t like to read or may lose interest in books before they are done because the format of this book is pretty cool. The illustrations and the way the pages are laid out and the different fonts used make the book fun to read (plus the story rocks). To learn more about Vordak and his books visit his website by clicking HERE.

I give it 5 out of 5 book worms (my puny Rating System could not measure the greatness of this book, so I’ll give it the highest I can)!

Vordak the Incomprehensible: How to Grow Up and Rule the World – or a how-to book every child should have

28 Jun

Vordak the Incomprehensible: How to Grow Up and Rule the World

By  Vordak T. Incomprehensible (transcribed by Scott Seegert)

Illustrated by John Martin

Published in 2010 by Egmont

208 pages – Ages 9-12

Are you mean, evil, ruthless…. all of the above? If you said “yes” to any of these then answer this question: Would you rather take over the world or just lay around while someone else does? Wait don’t answer yet! I know what you will pick – Rule the world! Even I pick “rule the world” and I’m a nice guy!

In this book Vordak the Incomprehensible reveals everything you need to plan to take over the world MWAHAHAHAHAHA! You will learn how to pick your evil name, put together your evil lair and put your evil plan of world domination into place. Just take a look at the table of contents!

Who could ask for anything more?!?

This book is HILARIOUS!! The book makes it seem like an actual evil villan (Vordak) wrote it but really Scott Seegert did. The book was fun to read and would be good for some kids who maybe aren’t too interested in reading (but maybe want to take over the world, MWAHAHAHAHAHA!) The illustrations are cool and detailed. Some parents might not “get” the humor about telling kids how to take over the world, but it is not at all violent, it’s just funny! I don’t know how I didn’t find this book sooner, it came out in 2010, but I am glad I found it!

You can learn more about Vordak by visiting his site (click on his picture)

PLUS Vordak’s next book -Vordak the Incomprehensible: Rule the School  is due to come out  August 23 of 2011! Pre-order a copy HERE!

I give this book 5 out of 5 glorious book worms OF DOOOOOOOM!

Now excuse me….I have to go work on my world domination plan……

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